under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
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