I'm gonna have a badass scar
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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