I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
