Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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