it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
I just had sex on a roof
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