i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
