my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
