Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
