so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
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