Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
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