dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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