i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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