Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I am one with the molecules
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
