Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
