I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
I enjoy the company of your penis
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize
