I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Randomize
