I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Randomize
