So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I see more hoeing in ur future
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
