i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
Randomize
