Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
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