i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
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