I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
