let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
