Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Randomize
