i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
i believe in u and ur pee
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