Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
