Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
