So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
