Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
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