Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
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