your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
