Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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