Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
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