I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Randomize
