He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
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