so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I got her a Nickelback box set.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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