all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
foreskin is a definite game changer
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Randomize
