508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
"it" just moved
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
