Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
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