According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
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