all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
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