you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
