Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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