just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
