Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
