Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
