I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
