found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Randomize
