In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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