haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
